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Sunday, July 27, 2014

frame of mind

so this has got to be my all time favourite part of the year. done with exams, thrilled with results, and at the very start of a nice long summer break. it's hard not to come across as smug and self-satisfied, apologies in advance. third year's the longest year of medsch and i'm just so relieved it's over. found out earlier this week and heaved a huge sigh of relief after my panic in NYC. grateful for a good mind, or a pseudo good mind at least, and that uni the second time round isn't too taxing. big believer in having my cake and eating it, and as a graduate, much as i love clinic and patients, i've other priorities. like a husband, and a marriage that i think being present for is very important. not that we have to travel as much as we do, but why not? also, always conscious that it's prudent to make the most of time together before any future babies come along. then again, the mister's insistent that we'll treat any future kiddos guai lo style and lug them everywhere with us. baby wearing and the like. but that's him, and his visions of the future. i'm a little less enamoured, a little less involved. it's no secret that i'm not fond of children, and pull a face every time some screaming kid disrupts my otherwise tranquil brunch experience. and pull a bigger face any time i think some entitled parent is, well, being entitled. biggest fear is becoming said entitled parent by virtue of popping out some mini-me. but we'll see how that goes. 

it's shaping up to be a good summer. off to aix tomorrow to visit one of my favourite girls. not seen her since our wedding two years ago, and last stayed at with her family four years ago on my grad trip. booked pretty last minute (while in the throes of revision last week and desperately needing some extrinsic motivation) and psyched to make it happen. we've lavender fields, vineyards and truffle farms to look forward to. plus a cellulite-busting walk one of the mornings.

briefly back to londontown then cruising quaint villages and small towns along the coast, followed by a couple of days in lisbon. a little riddicks to make two separate trips to france within the same week, albeit south then north. i hate the sentiment YOLO seems to encompass but can't describe it better? work hard, play harder? again, so gross and trader-esque. if nothing else, NYC taught me that finance types mess with my sense of perception. nothing against them flashing their cash, but my inner medic just cringes with self-loathing every time someone drops what's possibly my first year's salary on a night out. will be back in singers at some point then back to school! 

a little something i'm really happy about is not having to leave central london. fingers crossed i'll be able to connect the dots and it's not something i've spoken of much for fear of jinxing it but it's looking like i'm going to be at zone 1 hospitals for the next school year. can't begin to tell you how excited this makes me. being able to walk to clinics is the dream :) excited for the break, and excited to be back to work eventually. 

here's a photo of my celebratory fish&chips after the last paper. did have multiple celebrations, really. dimsum lunch, fish&chips tea, lebanese supper etc but it was all cautious celebration because results were only coming out the next day. and when those came out, pulled out the stops and celebrated proper with the grads over a blow out lunch where i broke out the wine i'd been saving. happiness is in the big and the small. thankful for a great group of friends who've gotten me through the year, and again, as always, grateful to be where i want to be, doing what i want to do :)


till then, the NYC series will continue and i might pop back with the odd holiday update. 

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